When I was 12 years old I went to fat camp because, well – I was fat. The funny thing about being 12 years old at fat camp, is that you have a lot of time on your hands, which you can use any way … Continue reading Hip-Hop, Failure Or How To Find Your True North
A lot of happiness in life comes from the ability to self-direct our efforts. In other words, if we want to be happy, it’s a good idea to figure out a way to make a living from something where we have considerable influence on what we do.
Most artistic pursuits fit this category. So does writing. So does a million other professions – but the point is, if we want to make ourselves a life where we choose to be self-directed, we must realize that only doing it when we feel motivated is not enough. We have to show up whether we feel like it or not.
This is even truer if you are trying to make a living in a profession where there is not necessarily an obvious path. Or at least where most people’s path is different. And it is especially true if you strike out in a profession where you have to work for 0 income for a while, or even have to put money into the endeavor with little to nothing to show for it like most inventors.
The essence of this brief blog post is that you don’t need motivation. What you need is discipline to show up every day and do the work whether you feel like it or not.
Once you have that discipline, you’re all set to strike out on your own.
Whenever something good happens to other people – especially people we have some sort of relationship to – our immediate reaction is to feel a tinge of hotness in our stomach.
The thought that goes along with it, can range from “oh, shucks I wish it was me” to “how on earth could they promote that motherfucker, he is dumb as a doorknob?!?”
The point is, we all feel jealous from time to time – it’s a very human emotion – and it’s very hard to deal with, truth be told. We’re raised to believe that jealousy is a sin, and that we must avoid it at all costs, but avoiding certain emotions because they’re supposedly not good for us, has all sorts of psychological drawbacks in its own right.
So I’m here to tell you to indulge your jealousy, because in all honesty there are very few people who I genuinely want good things to happen to besides myself.
I don’t think as myself as Satan incarnate, but I am very much human and what I’m getting at, is that being un-jealous is incredibly hard – at least for me – and since you’ve read this far, my guess is you feel the same.
What I want to do is to put the shoe on the other foot, and instead of obsessing over ways not to be jealous, or trying to think of how we can all become better people by wishing well for others, I’m going to encourage you to indulge your jealousy.
It’s okay to not want good things to happen to others.
Feel your anger, your spite and your fury in all it’s magnificence.
But here’s the plot twist: who and what you’re jealous of and why tells you a lot about your deepest, hidden motivations.
I am sorely jealous of most talented non-fiction writers. I’d swap lives with Tim Ferriss, Dan Pink and especially Tim Urban in a heartbeat.
I adore these guys, and I want them to be incredibly successful so that I can continue to enjoy their work, but I also want a career like them.
I’m motivated by the freedom they have, by the creative genius they all possess and I’m jealous of their extraordinary gifts.
Who you’re jealous of, tells the story of your deepest desires, so if you really want to find out what motivates you, find out who makes you the most jealous.